Thursday, January 22, 2009
Sunday, January 11, 2009
Today and every day
I realize it really has been a long time since I posted a blog. Truth is, I have 3 posts on the go right now.. they are saved in my drafts folder. However, it is pretty much mandatory that this one gets posted today.. I might not quite make it, though. Forgive me. I only have 19 minutes left until this day is officially over.
So, today is January 11th. This particular date made me realize how important every day is. It made me realize that every day can be life-changing (whether you want it to be or not.)... and that it's impossible for us to know what each day will bring... and then even after the day is over, it's impossible to know the significance of that day's events and what impact they will have on our future. That's what I think of when I think of January 11th. Here's why.
Last year at this time I was not going to school. I had two jobs. I had decided a couple weeks prior to this day that I would move to Vancouver... and at this point in time, I was planning to move within a month (or two.. but February was my goal.) I didn't really know why, but I knew that I needed to move.
Last year at this time I had a best friend who I had not seen in two weeks. This was pretty unusual. I didn't know why I hadn't seen my best friend in two weeks.. I knew something was wrong, but I didn't know what. (In fact, I didn't find out what was wrong until almost half a year later.)
That evening I was going to a show with some people from my church. My best friend had originally thought that he would go, but hadn't confirmed anything and didn't respond when I asked for confirmation. It had been a weird day all-round. 2008 was off to an interesting start. Truth be told, I wasn't overjoyed. I was in a good place, though... at least, in hindsight, it seems that it was good.
I wasn't feeling on top of the world by any means that evening. I felt betrayed in some ways after not hearing from my best friend. I know I checked my phone a lot throughout the night, thinking that a text message might arrive explaining everything. It didn't happen.
Looking back, I realize how wrong I was about everything. I thought that my best friend at the time was supposed to be my best friend for life. My mind was so narrowly focused that, had things gone my way, I would've missed out on a lot.
That night, I was the only girl from my church who was going to the show. It was me and five guys. Two of them (brothers), I met for the first time that night; Jordan and Luke.
This year on January 11th I am a student. I work part-time. I live in Vancouver. And I have not seen my best friend in almost two weeks, but this time, I know why.
It's been a year since I met my best friend, Jordan.. on the way to a show - A show which I thought my former best friend should've been at.
Today I can say that I'm glad he decided not to go with me that evening... and I'm glad he decided that we could no longer be friends. And I'm glad that I will always be reminded on this day, January 11th, that when I ask God to take control of my life, and help me live the way he wants me to live... he will. And things might not always seem right at the time.. and then again, they may seem perfect.. but my view is narrow. Tomorrow, everything could change. But I can have peace in knowing that God sees the big picture and whatever happens, I can trust that it's all part of the plan.
"Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known." -1 Corinthians 13:12
So, today is January 11th. This particular date made me realize how important every day is. It made me realize that every day can be life-changing (whether you want it to be or not.)... and that it's impossible for us to know what each day will bring... and then even after the day is over, it's impossible to know the significance of that day's events and what impact they will have on our future. That's what I think of when I think of January 11th. Here's why.
Last year at this time I was not going to school. I had two jobs. I had decided a couple weeks prior to this day that I would move to Vancouver... and at this point in time, I was planning to move within a month (or two.. but February was my goal.) I didn't really know why, but I knew that I needed to move.
Last year at this time I had a best friend who I had not seen in two weeks. This was pretty unusual. I didn't know why I hadn't seen my best friend in two weeks.. I knew something was wrong, but I didn't know what. (In fact, I didn't find out what was wrong until almost half a year later.)
That evening I was going to a show with some people from my church. My best friend had originally thought that he would go, but hadn't confirmed anything and didn't respond when I asked for confirmation. It had been a weird day all-round. 2008 was off to an interesting start. Truth be told, I wasn't overjoyed. I was in a good place, though... at least, in hindsight, it seems that it was good.
I wasn't feeling on top of the world by any means that evening. I felt betrayed in some ways after not hearing from my best friend. I know I checked my phone a lot throughout the night, thinking that a text message might arrive explaining everything. It didn't happen.
Looking back, I realize how wrong I was about everything. I thought that my best friend at the time was supposed to be my best friend for life. My mind was so narrowly focused that, had things gone my way, I would've missed out on a lot.
That night, I was the only girl from my church who was going to the show. It was me and five guys. Two of them (brothers), I met for the first time that night; Jordan and Luke.
This year on January 11th I am a student. I work part-time. I live in Vancouver. And I have not seen my best friend in almost two weeks, but this time, I know why.
It's been a year since I met my best friend, Jordan.. on the way to a show - A show which I thought my former best friend should've been at.
Today I can say that I'm glad he decided not to go with me that evening... and I'm glad he decided that we could no longer be friends. And I'm glad that I will always be reminded on this day, January 11th, that when I ask God to take control of my life, and help me live the way he wants me to live... he will. And things might not always seem right at the time.. and then again, they may seem perfect.. but my view is narrow. Tomorrow, everything could change. But I can have peace in knowing that God sees the big picture and whatever happens, I can trust that it's all part of the plan.
"Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known." -1 Corinthians 13:12
Monday, December 1, 2008
APOLOGIES AND APOLOGETIX
So.. once again I've kind of dropped the ball known as the blog. I apologize most sincerely. I have been busy with final projects.. and now exam studying.. but I'm taking a break to write this.
The last month has been interesting... filled with bizarre experiences, art, science, community (and lackthereof), economic struggle, and the general struggles of humanity. and God. Not really in that order, although sometimes it feels that way.
A few weeks ago I had a discussion with an atheist about God and spirituality. I hate to admit that this "us and them" mentality was beginning to take its toll on me and it took an awkward conversation to begin the breakdown of what I've begun to think of as "the great wall of Christianity." yuck.
I think that for a lot of us (growing up in North American culture) god seems like a no-brainer.. I mean, of course there's a god.. what he does and how he does it are debatable.. but ya, there's a higher power. It's easy to discuss God with anyone who's a theist, deist, or even agnostic.
So atheism.. well, possibly one of the best conversations I've had all year was with this girl. It's already become apparent to me that the field of cognitive science is one of the most difficult fields to be a Christian in. That is to say, my beliefs were already being significantly challenged... making me feel all the more longing to hide behind that ridiculous Christian wall.
So our conversation began. It could've ended within seconds I think. She said, "God doesn't exist so why would I want to fake it?"
I said, "You wouldn't."
But we talked for longer.. talking about why people believe in God and the possibility of humans creating God as a way to answer all the unanswerable questions. Unfortunately I think her arguments were more convincing than mine.. especially when I didn't actually argue. I mean, I wasn't there to debate. I was intrigued.
It got me thinking (yay!) I thought, "why do I believe in God?" I've often asked myself, "what do I believe about God?" and "what is the purpose of life?" but, taking away my Christian background.. and supposing that I was not raised in a Christian home.. would I believe in God? During the last two weeks, I came up with two reasons why I believe that God exists.. also why I believe the bible is "God-breathed" .. as it also seemed to make sense.
So, since I don't want to write a novel here.. my next two blogs will be my two reasons or "proofs" (I use that word lightly as I don't think God can actually be humanly proven) pertaining to the existence of God. They are personal reasons. You will likely not find them convincing.. however.. I don't want to convince you.
So..
Until we meet again,
-E
The last month has been interesting... filled with bizarre experiences, art, science, community (and lackthereof), economic struggle, and the general struggles of humanity. and God. Not really in that order, although sometimes it feels that way.
A few weeks ago I had a discussion with an atheist about God and spirituality. I hate to admit that this "us and them" mentality was beginning to take its toll on me and it took an awkward conversation to begin the breakdown of what I've begun to think of as "the great wall of Christianity." yuck.
I think that for a lot of us (growing up in North American culture) god seems like a no-brainer.. I mean, of course there's a god.. what he does and how he does it are debatable.. but ya, there's a higher power. It's easy to discuss God with anyone who's a theist, deist, or even agnostic.
So atheism.. well, possibly one of the best conversations I've had all year was with this girl. It's already become apparent to me that the field of cognitive science is one of the most difficult fields to be a Christian in. That is to say, my beliefs were already being significantly challenged... making me feel all the more longing to hide behind that ridiculous Christian wall.
So our conversation began. It could've ended within seconds I think. She said, "God doesn't exist so why would I want to fake it?"
I said, "You wouldn't."
But we talked for longer.. talking about why people believe in God and the possibility of humans creating God as a way to answer all the unanswerable questions. Unfortunately I think her arguments were more convincing than mine.. especially when I didn't actually argue. I mean, I wasn't there to debate. I was intrigued.
It got me thinking (yay!) I thought, "why do I believe in God?" I've often asked myself, "what do I believe about God?" and "what is the purpose of life?" but, taking away my Christian background.. and supposing that I was not raised in a Christian home.. would I believe in God? During the last two weeks, I came up with two reasons why I believe that God exists.. also why I believe the bible is "God-breathed" .. as it also seemed to make sense.
So, since I don't want to write a novel here.. my next two blogs will be my two reasons or "proofs" (I use that word lightly as I don't think God can actually be humanly proven) pertaining to the existence of God. They are personal reasons. You will likely not find them convincing.. however.. I don't want to convince you.
So..
Until we meet again,
-E
Sunday, November 9, 2008
JUSTICE
My sincerest apologies for not writing in forever (and then some.)
I'll be posting more soon, but for now.. here's a song that so strongly represents my heart that I couldn't help but post it..
God of Justice
by Tim Hughes
"God of Justice, Saviour to all
Came to rescue the weak and the poor
Chose to serve and not be served
Jesus, You have called us
Freely we've received
Now freely we will give
We must go live to feed the hungry
Stand beside the broken
We must go
Stepping forward keep us from just singing
Move us into action
We must go
To act justly everyday
Loving mercy in every way
Walking humbly before You God
You have shown us, what You require
Freely we've received
Now freely we will give
Fill us up and send us out
Fill us up and send us out
Fill us up and send us out Lord"
I'll be posting more soon, but for now.. here's a song that so strongly represents my heart that I couldn't help but post it..
God of Justice
by Tim Hughes
"God of Justice, Saviour to all
Came to rescue the weak and the poor
Chose to serve and not be served
Jesus, You have called us
Freely we've received
Now freely we will give
We must go live to feed the hungry
Stand beside the broken
We must go
Stepping forward keep us from just singing
Move us into action
We must go
To act justly everyday
Loving mercy in every way
Walking humbly before You God
You have shown us, what You require
Freely we've received
Now freely we will give
Fill us up and send us out
Fill us up and send us out
Fill us up and send us out Lord"
Sunday, October 19, 2008
RAIN DELAYS
Rain Delays
By Crash Parallel
The sleepless nights and endless days,
Mini skirts and serving trays,
Waking up from rain delays,
And selling sex for pocket change,
And living off the alcohol,
With no one but a cab to call,
And lost inside a bathroom stall,
This carbon copy life withdrawal,
And I need, Someone to believe in.
And driving cars we cant afford,
Just to make in sure were never bored,
Living off our own accord
Between coffee grinds and corner stores
Limousines and cigarettes,
Chasing dreams with fishing nets
And long weekends with out regrets
Well no one here is taking bets
And I need, Someone to believe in
Yes someone to fill this space, with grace
To look into my eyes and touch my face
To make me feel alive today
Someone to make me strong
Someone to make me belong
Someone to make it all right
Someone to make me feel alive, yeah
And stretching out like rubber bands
To kiss the cheeks and shake the hands
And pool halls and wonderlands.
With strong arms and no legs to stand
And getting by on hand me downs
With your tips, your drinks, your buying rounds
Back to my old stomping grounds
Like children in the lost and found
And I need, Someone to believe in
Yes, someone to fill this space, with grace
To look into my eyes and touch my face
To make me feel alive today
By Crash Parallel
The sleepless nights and endless days,
Mini skirts and serving trays,
Waking up from rain delays,
And selling sex for pocket change,
And living off the alcohol,
With no one but a cab to call,
And lost inside a bathroom stall,
This carbon copy life withdrawal,
And I need, Someone to believe in.
And driving cars we cant afford,
Just to make in sure were never bored,
Living off our own accord
Between coffee grinds and corner stores
Limousines and cigarettes,
Chasing dreams with fishing nets
And long weekends with out regrets
Well no one here is taking bets
And I need, Someone to believe in
Yes someone to fill this space, with grace
To look into my eyes and touch my face
To make me feel alive today
Someone to make me strong
Someone to make me belong
Someone to make it all right
Someone to make me feel alive, yeah
And stretching out like rubber bands
To kiss the cheeks and shake the hands
And pool halls and wonderlands.
With strong arms and no legs to stand
And getting by on hand me downs
With your tips, your drinks, your buying rounds
Back to my old stomping grounds
Like children in the lost and found
And I need, Someone to believe in
Yes, someone to fill this space, with grace
To look into my eyes and touch my face
To make me feel alive today
Friday, October 10, 2008
No Greater Joy
Today I was shuffling through my iPod and it came to a song that is one of my favourites. However, it seems I have never paid that much attention to the lyrics.. That is to say, the first verse caught me off guard. Maybe because purpose has been such a hot topic lately.. I don't know.. but the verse goes like this:
"No greater joy
Is there than this
To know for what
We're meant to live
To hold Your hand
To touch Your face
To find ourselves
In loves embrace"
To say that there's "No greater joy" is quite a bold statement.. incredibly bold actually. Also incredibly peaceful... to think that there is nothing better in the world than recognizing what you're living for... knowing your purpose. Also knowing that it's such a beautiful purpose..
I've posted the rest of the lyrics here.. along with a picture that this song reminds me of.
I want to stand before the King
Join in the song that heaven sings
I want to hold the hand that holds the world
I want to know the mystery
Reach out and touch the majesty
I want to hold the hand tht holds the world
No greater love
Could be bestowed
That You would name us as your own
Your daughters sing
Your sons rejoice
They gather here before
Your throne
You are, You are
The author of creation
We are, the children of your heart
You are, You are,
The light of all the heaven
We rise, to worship all You are
-The Hand that Holds the World
by Starfield
"No greater joy
Is there than this
To know for what
We're meant to live
To hold Your hand
To touch Your face
To find ourselves
In loves embrace"
To say that there's "No greater joy" is quite a bold statement.. incredibly bold actually. Also incredibly peaceful... to think that there is nothing better in the world than recognizing what you're living for... knowing your purpose. Also knowing that it's such a beautiful purpose..
I've posted the rest of the lyrics here.. along with a picture that this song reminds me of.
I want to stand before the King
Join in the song that heaven sings
I want to hold the hand that holds the world
I want to know the mystery
Reach out and touch the majesty
I want to hold the hand tht holds the world
No greater love
Could be bestowed
That You would name us as your own
Your daughters sing
Your sons rejoice
They gather here before
Your throne
You are, You are
The author of creation
We are, the children of your heart
You are, You are,
The light of all the heaven
We rise, to worship all You are
-The Hand that Holds the World
by Starfield
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
FROM MEXICO CITY TO VANCOUVER TO SEOUL
Tonight I went to the Vancouver Passion Conference
It was truly amazing.. I could say a lot about it. But I won't.. I just want to show a picture that I think speaks thousands of words. Two nights ago, the Passion Tour was in Mexico City. This picture is from there :)
At every stop on the tour, each city has been asked to pray for the next. The city after this one is Seoul, South Korea. If you pray, and you think of it on Friday... please pray for Seoul. :)
God of This City
You're the God of this city
You're the King of these people
You're the Lord of this nation
You Are
For there is no one like our God
There is no one like our God
Greater things have yet to come
Great things are still to be done
In this city
Greater things are still to come
And greater things are still to be done here
You're the Lord of Creation
The Creator of all things
You're the King above all Kings
You Are
You're the strength in our weakness
You're the love to the broken
You're the joy in the sadness
You Are
Greater things have yet to come
Great things are still to be done
In this city
Where glory shines from hearts alive
With praise for you and love for you
In this city
It was truly amazing.. I could say a lot about it. But I won't.. I just want to show a picture that I think speaks thousands of words. Two nights ago, the Passion Tour was in Mexico City. This picture is from there :)
At every stop on the tour, each city has been asked to pray for the next. The city after this one is Seoul, South Korea. If you pray, and you think of it on Friday... please pray for Seoul. :)
God of This City
You're the God of this city
You're the King of these people
You're the Lord of this nation
You Are
For there is no one like our God
There is no one like our God
Greater things have yet to come
Great things are still to be done
In this city
Greater things are still to come
And greater things are still to be done here
You're the Lord of Creation
The Creator of all things
You're the King above all Kings
You Are
You're the strength in our weakness
You're the love to the broken
You're the joy in the sadness
You Are
Greater things have yet to come
Great things are still to be done
In this city
Where glory shines from hearts alive
With praise for you and love for you
In this city
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